IBK + 1

My heart is beating so fast writing this post.

I’m nervous.

It has nothing to do with knocking out walls or mixing paint colors.

Mildly DIY related.

I have always been pretty open about my infertility and PCOS.  And I even announced on our blog that we had plans to adopt.  I understand how devastating infertility is.  It makes people uncomfortable to talk about it.  Ever since I was 16, I was told it was next to impossible for me to get pregnant.  I joined the infertile-myrtle club.  So, I hope I can sensitively write this post.  Some of my most dear friends are going through the depths of hell with their infertility.

Friends of IBK know that we went to Disneyland in April.

Cars Land

And oh man.  My boobs killed in the Magic Kingdom.  Tmi?  Just keepin it real.  But I didn’t think anything of it.  Although, I was pretty vocal about it.  I’m sure Parker thought I was a cray lady.

We got home from Disneyland, and Aaron “lovingly” forced encouraged me to take a test.  Which wasn’t too out of the ordinary for a lady with PCOS who goes up to a year with no cycle.  Sometimes you just gotta check in and make sure there’s nothing weird growing up in your bits.  Anyway.  I took it.  I cannot think of any humanly words to describe my feeling when first seeing the 2nd line show up.  Sheer terror is probably the closest description.  This is the part where I make a horrible infertile lady.  I have always been okay with knowing we would adopt.  I have always openly admitted that nothing scares/grosses me out more than pregnancy and childbirth.  But I LOVE babies.  I LOVE children.  I will forever be a primary worker.  And I’m cool with that.

So I sit there.  Looking at this piece of plastic with 2 lines.  And I just start crying.  Because I am so happy.  I have always wanted this.  And I have always been scared of it.  But I’ve always had faith I could do it.

Pregnancy Announcement

Now I have to tell Aaron.  I just walk out into the kitchen and hold it up to his face.  I’ve never seen a happier man in my entire life.  He had a smile bigger than Texas.  He was jumping around the kitchen hollering about how he was going to be a dad.  I was just shaking.  I kind of didn’t believe it.  So I sent him to the store to buy 5 more tests, all different brands.  I took them, all at different times, with different batches of pee.  Just to be sure.  All positive.  Holy crap.  Now what?

It has been pretty uneventful from then until now.  It has been a really rough first trimester.  So much puking.  I had the swine flu in 2009.  I swore nothing could be worse than that.  I’m here to tell you, the first trimester has been worse than the swine flu.  Although, it’s nice knowing I get a treasure at the end of this.  🙂  As of now, we are 11 weeks.  So ALMOST out of the first trimester.  Just one more week.  And I’m holding strong to the promise of nausea getting the fluff out of here.  The heartbeat is strong and good.  Baby is growing like it’s supposed to.  Has the right number of head, arms, and legs.

So where does that leave us?  Feeling incredibly blessed.

Pregnancy Announcement

So maybe you’ll be a little more patient with me now you know.  And now you also know why I haven’t posted much.  I’ve felt like a garbage can.  But a happy garbage can 🙂

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  • Stephanie, Sandpaper and Glue

    HOOOOOOORAYYYYYYY BABY IBK!!!!!!!!!!!! You did a great job writing this post, I love you and your now best DIY of all time 🙂

    • Kenz

      I love you! Baby IBK is so lucky. So many people already love its guts out!

  • Bethany Kline

    lol! “a happy garbage can” hahaha you are too much girl! I know I have said this to you all over fb but i am just so excited for y’all! Really and truly! I can’t wait to keep hearing about it and see pics of ultrasounds, eeeek! I know you guys are gonna rock at this, no question about that! and now we get IBK nursery addition soon!!! Yes!! <3

    • Kenz

      Girl. The nursery. You have NO IDEA. It is going to be killer! I have a confession to make. I’ve already started secret nursery projects. And I have been DYING to share them! Now I can! love you!

      • Bethany Kline

        like I’m surprised! cmon! 😉

  • Emma (Broke Ass Home)

    I am so unbelieveably excited and overjoyed for you. Do not feel guilty about being an “unfertile” woman that beat it. It’s SUPER EXCITING and the rest of us are excited with you!

    • Kenz

      You are next. I know it. My senses are tingling. 🙂 xoxo

  • Ainhoa

    Huge congrats to both of you!! That’s awesome! 🙂

    • Kenz

      Thank you Ainhoa!

  • heather

    I’m so excited for you guys!! Its strange how you feel like you know someone that you only follow online (sounds stalkerish, but you know what I mean) I deal with PCOS as well and it just makes my heart soar that you beat the odds…and I’m not gonna lie…I teared up a bit. Can’t wait to hear (read) all about how the pregnancy goes. Best of luck!

    • Kenz

      Hi Heather 🙂 Not stalkerish at all. I have made so many best friends over the internet and through blogging. I LOVE getting to know the people who read my blog. And I love reading theirs. PCOS is such a hard thing to deal with. It’s so common, but so under-managed. There isn’t any solid school of thought yet, or awareness of it. Let me know if you ever want to talk about PCOS together. You can email me whenever! I can share with you things that have worked for me and really made a difference. Thank you for commenting! I’m really happy to hear from you 🙂

  • Katja @ Shift Ctrl ART

    Woooohoooooo!!!!!!! Our two lines took for e v aa hhhhh too, so I know just how you feel. This is so awesome!! Congratulations!! Now, go sit down and relax… wait, that was for me… I am so excited for you!! It’s gonna be great 🙂

    • Kenz

      I’m glad you know exactly what it’s like to wait for those 2 lines. It’s so unbelievable when you see them. haha, I am ALL FOR sitting down and relaxing. So I’m going to pretend that really was for me 🙂 xoxo

  • andrea @ mykindaperfect.com

    I am so unbelievably excited for you and Aaron!!! I got super teary just when I saw “IBK + 1”. You have so much to be excited for with this whole new DIY project! =) Congratulations!!!!

    • Kenz

      Ohhhhhh thanks Andrea! I adore you. Thank you for being excited with me. It’s going to be great!

  • [email protected]

    Hi Kenz,

    I am a new reader, not sure if I’ve commented yet. But want to say how happy I am for you. I also had PCOS (and endometriosis). I know infertility hell. I know it marks a person for always, even after the double lines appear. I am always so, so happy when I read about one of us joining the ranks of the Mommy Club. We’ve got our own branch in there. Welcome!

    • Kenz

      This makes me so happy! I’m happy to meet you Rita! What’s the link for your blog? I’d love to come check it out 🙂 I love talking to other ladies with PCOS problems. It’s always nice to hear how they manage it. There’s such a wide range of thought on it. I hope you stick around. I’m happy to be friends 🙂

      • [email protected]

        http://www.thissortaoldlife.com
        I don’t really have PCOS problems now–hysterectomy a few years ago solved my multiple issues. Took continuous oral contraceptives after my IVF twins were born.

        • Kenz

          Thanks for leaving your link. I’m going to head over now! I’m glad your PCOS problems have pretty much gone away. IVF twins are magical! I LOVE it.

  • Gretchen

    Congratulations!!!!! I’m so excited for you! Winter babies are the best….so snuggly 🙂 Yay! You made my day!

    • Kenz

      Thanks Gretchen! I can’t wait to snuggle the crap out of this little bundle. It’s all I can think about while I puke up my breakfast, and water, and vitamins… and everything that goes in. 🙂 haha!

  • Maggie

    What a big challenge to overcome and now a wonderful, scary, amazing, (and I guess a little pukey) gift to enjoy!

    • Kenz

      haha you are RIGHT on! It’s been such a scary and exciting adventure so far. I’ve had so many mini freak outs and melt downs trying to figure out what I’m going to do. But I have never felt better about anything else in my whole life. Thanks for being excited with us 🙂

  • Rebecca Crowder Cantwell

    I have to say that I have sat and cried for the last two days!! I am so happy for you!! God makes miracles happen and in this case he could not have chosen better people!! Thank you for sharing this and the way that you found out! I love this blog. I enjoy reading all of the fancy things that you make but this one tops it off!!! This one has touched my heart. You have amazed me since I met you with all of your accomplishments and you are truly one of the most amazing people I have ever met!! Congratulations my beautiful niece you are going to be the best MOMMY ever!!! I love you!!!

    • Kenz

      Aunt Becky, you are so so so kind to me. I’m just a regular person 🙂 But I sure do love you. This is for a sure a miracle, and I am feeling extremely blessed. I’m so grateful that the people around us can recognize it as a miracle too. I’m so overwhelmed with all the love and support. LOVE YOU!

  • Ann @ Such a Mama

    Congratulations! But, umm…. My doctor told us that that telling moms that morning sickness goes away after the first trimester is a lie they tell to give them hope. There is medication! If you are losing too much weight, take teh medicine!

    • Kenz

      Yeah, they said it’s hit and miss. For some people it’s almost instantly gone after the first trimester, and others deal with it the whole 9 months. I definitely love zofran, haha!

  • Sarah {Life in Ryans}

    So delighted for you both! That’s fantastic news!! Hope you start to feel better soon too 🙂

    • Kenz

      Thanks Sarah! I am sooo happy!

  • Henriette

    I am so thrilled for you! Lucky baby and lucky parents <3 and I said we are the same person on different continents;-) I didn't think I was going to get pregnant, with the PCOS and all, and never really wished for children. All of a sudden, a couple of weeks ago, there was two lines, a cross and "pregnant" on all five tests. I can't believe it, and I don't think I will until we (hopefully) see a heartbeat on the ultrasound on Wednesday 🙂 ) anyway, didn't mean to try and "steal your thunder" – its just too cool that it happens to both of us on almost the same time 😀 can't wait to see your baby-interior-posts!

    Xxx

    • Kenz

      OH MY GOSH ARE YOU SERIOUS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE ARE THE SAME PERSON!!!! HENRIETTE!!!!!! This is amazing. I’m all teary right now. Wow. I can’t even believe it! I’m so excited we can go through this together. Good luck at your ultra sound! When we heard the heart beat, I was a puddle. Wow. I’m SOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!! AH!!!!!!

  • Caitlin J.

    You and Aaron are going to be the best parents ever. And your baby is seriously the luckiest baby ever! After I called you the other day, I wasn’t sure if I should cry or jump up and down so I did both! I also told several of my friends here in Santa Cruz, and they’re very excited for you too. This could not have happened to two better people!

    • Kenz

      Oh my gosh. I love you so much! I was so happy you called so fast! I don’t know why, but I was having major anxiety telling people. I’ve definitely done a whole bunch of crying and jumping 🙂 It’s the best miracle ever. I’m really excited. I get a little worried that Aaron and I might be the most outrageous parents ever. But that’s not a bad thing… right? haha. LOVE YOU! COME VISIT ME!!!

  • Jen Wilson

    Kenz! I am SO happy for you!!!!!!!!!!! You just made me cry!

    • Kenz

      oh!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks Jen! You are so wonderful!

  • Ashley

    Wow. Wow!!! So, so thrilled for you–this is awesome!! You will be a fantastic mama. Congrats to you and Aaron!!

    • Kenz

      Thanks Ashley! I’m pretty nervous. But SO excited. 🙂

  • Beth @ Sawdust and Embryos

    I just keep smiling. 🙂

    • Kenz

      Thanks for all your happy texts. I’m SO happy we are real friends 🙂

  • Michelle

    Ahhhhhh! Congrats!!! You two are adorable. So happy for you!

    • Kenz

      Oh thanks! The most adorable 🙂 Hopefully our kid will be half as cute as Ike.

  • eranfaraway

    Kenzzzzzz! Ahhh I am too excited for you! The Crowder home seems to be filled with wonderful people and you and Aaron deserve everything that could possibly bring you happiness! I read the title and thought you were getting another roommate, or dog, or decided on using two logos, but this is infinity times better! I’m sorry you’re dealing with morning sickness. I know you don’t need more things to think about, but I selfishly can’t wait to see the nursery you’re going to put together for baby Crowder! I hope there is a hammock, because I’ve always thought that would make killer nursing seating but I am a long ways away from baby-making so I hope you steal my idea!

    • Kenz

      Oh Erin. I adore you so much! We are so excited to add this little room mate into our lives 🙂 I am SO excited for the nursery. I have tried to hold off until we know if little Clam Crowder is a little man or lady. But I have been working on a secret little project. I think you’ll love it. It’s right up our ally. Ha, we should do a hammock in the nursery. Karl would be so happy!

  • eranfaraway

    PS – Sooo adorable that you’re due on Christmas! Maybe baby Crowder will be swaddled in a stocking!

    • Kenz

      That would be the sweetest newborn picture ever!!!

  • Tara @ Surburble

    Congratulations a thousand times! That is such amazing news – I just don’t know what else to say aside from CONGRATS! You’re such an awesome lady; you’re going to make a great mama. And I’m sure that the characteristics you love in Aaron are what’s going to make him an amazing dad. A tip from me to you: You make the most of this pregnancy – it’s an excuse to take it easy, to enjoy some quiet time, and to make Aaron do stuff for you because you’ve been upchucking for half the day.

    I cannot WAIT to see the baby/nursery/giant backyard playground projects you guys come up with!

    • Kenz

      I love you Tara! That is solid advice 🙂 I have been doing a really good job of taking it easy. Well.. kind of. I’ve been showing houses a lot. But when I’m home, you can’t move me from the couch. Hence why no real house projects have been happening! Thank you for the well-wishes. It means so much coming from you!

  • SImply Sarah

    OH Kenz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Congrats! I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy for you. This will be the best “DIY Project” ever. People don’t talk out loud about conception issues but we all prob should. DH and I have been going through issues ourselves, so its quite uplifting to hear this good news for you guys.

    On a side note….I was due Dec 25th, but came on Dec 27th. My brother, my MIL, my aunt, and my Boss were all born on Christmas. I totally think you and I have a lot more in common than I could’ve realized. If you need bloggy help while during this time, let me know and I could prob do some guest posts for you or something!

    OH GIRL I am just so excited for you!

    • Kenz

      Awwww! Thanks so much Sarah! You are wonderful. Maybe this little Crowder will come on your birthday! That would be fun 🙂 We definitely have a bunch in common! I’ll let you know on the guest posts. It would definitely help out 🙂 Thanks again!

  • Amber @ Wills Casa

    OH MY GOSH!!! I am just now catching up! I literally have tears Kenz! TEARS!! I’m so excited for y’all. I can’t wait for all the baby updates and the belly pictures! This is the best news ever and totally made my day! Merry Christmas baby Crowder!

    • Kenz

      Thanks Amber! You were seriously the first person I thought of when we found out. I was so excited to be pregnant the same time as you! Eeeee! Thanks for being excited with me!!

  • Vanlun

    What great news Kenz!!! Congrats to you and hubby and I pray you have a great pregnancy and your baby is healthy. Really happy for you both.

  • Daize

    1st time at site & i love that it was such a happy post! Enjoy the ride of your first pregnancy!

    • Kenz

      Thanks Daize! I hope you stick around 🙂 I have some pretty good projects in the works right now!

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  • Nicole

    Wow what amazing news, congrats!! I just started following your blog and am looking forward to catching up on some of your posts 🙂 After going through an IVF cycle, my husband and I got pregnant and were expecting our little boy or girl December 5th! So Im definitely looking forward to all the posts you’ll be putting up as you’re right behind me 🙂 (btw–my heart was pounding as well writing up my blog post announcement I was so nervous/excited!)

    • Kenz

      Hi Nicole! Babies are so exciting! I’m so so excited for you and that the IVF went well. Have you found out what you’re having yet?! What’s the link to your blog? I’d love to check it out 🙂

      • Nicole Boenigk

        Thanks so much 🙂 We’re having a boy! I found out the second I could…I just couldn’t stand the constant dreams of the boys and the girls and the not knowing! lol Did you find out what you’ll be having or are you going to wait? I’m at http://www.diaryofamadcrafter.wordpress.com 🙂 Hope you’re feeling well!

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  • Rachel Ward

    Found your blog through Beth’s Sawdust and Embryos site, and have been snooping through your posts. 🙂 Just want to congratulate you. How amazing that you were able to get pregnant after being told you could not. 🙂 I am sorry how sick you’ve been though. I’ve heard you are sicker when carrying a girl, which I guess proves true for you! I am due in January and have been super-sick too–nausea all the time. We’ll see if that is because it’s a girl too! 🙂

    • Kenz

      Hi Rachel! Welcome! Isn’t Beth great?! She seriously is. Thank you so much for stopping by. It means a lot! I’m excited for you and your baby! Hopefully you have a girl too! Keep me posted! Do you have a blog?

      • Rachel Ward

        THANKS! 😀 YES!! Her blog is amazing and of course I’m so jealous of her talents and creativity(and yours too!). I can barely hammer a nail, so I live vicariously through other’s talents. 😉

        Thanks! 😀

        I have a very unused blog. Sometimes I write something when something exciting happens like an answered prayer, financial thing, etc, so nothing awesome like yours. 🙂 I think only 5 people know about it too. 😀

        • Kenz

          You know, I have a secret 2nd blog which is like that. I don’t post very often, other than things similar to what you mentioned. I’m definitely happy to let you live vicariously through my amateur DIY attempts. haha